Her Decision

She had accepted his marriage proposal. Already during her anniversary trip with him, as she told me now.

This is the end.
Why did she have to put smileys after each sentence? Was that necessary to rub this into my head?

This just shows that I do not understand anything about women. What was that hugging a few weeks ago? What was that re-starting of the friendship?

I do not envy her future husband. Instead I almost pity him. To be with a woman who seems to know about relationship only from "Desperate Housewifes" or from "Sex in the City". Who does not seem to have an understanding of the concept of love. She wants her marriage, plus she wants my friendship.

I do not want her friendship. I wanted her love, a relationship with her. If I wanted a friend I get a dog. A dog is man's best friend. Women are no friends.

My last words in my short reply email to her: "Best wishes and good luck".

I will not write to her anymore. There is no reason. I will remain silent. Somehow I will continue my life. I will finally return to my professional work, put the energy into it, which in the past 5 months I have instead poured in this pointless relationship. Already I feel a lot of drive towards working, towards achieving excellence in my work. I had noticed a significant slack during the past months... but I will catch up again.

And I will forget about women. A waste of time. They do not deserve it.